With a new month comes a new lip balm flavor, inspired by everyone’s favorite new scent.

I think we can all agree that the smell of a new car is one of the world’s greatest scents. From the foam insulation to the plasticky vinyl dash, it’s rich and evocative, perfect for applying to your lips!

New Car Lip Balm puts the “organic” in volatile organic compounds – with notes of rubber, steel, and car wax, with just a sprinkling of petroleum-based solvents. All is topped off with the faintest whisper of brominated flame retardants and exhaust fumes. Being a vegan product, we strive to deliver a 100% leather upholstery free lip balm experience.

So where did the idea for New Car Lip Balm come from? I’m glad you asked! I’m afraid it’s a rather tragic story, actually. You see, I can’t drive. Nope, never learned how. So back when I was working full-time in DC, I had to take the Metro to and from work. It brings a tear to my eye just thinking about it. When I would get to work, I would smell like the public. This, of course, was unacceptable as it created an unsavory work environment. I tried to cover up the stench of commuters; I tried Windex, hood wax, and even spritzed myself with gasoline. Nothing could give me that “new car” smell. I felt so terrible for my dear colleagues, but what could I do? (This was, of course, before Uber came along.)

Just picture it: for only $5, you can have the experience of driving a brand-new car! It’s a wonderful touch of luxury for anyone on a budget or simply too poor for nice things. It can also be used to make acquaintances think you’re not still driving that beat up ol’ clunker, or worse, taking public transportation *shudder*. Can you imagine!

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I hope at this point it goes without saying, but…

APRIL FOOLS!

If you’ve been following Molly Rose Balms for awhile, you’ll know that it’s a tradition for me to “release” a new Flavor of the Month every April 1st. Here’s a look at our previous delights:

April’s REAL Flavor of the Month is Cherry Blossom, which we will take a look at next week!